Modesty aside...

I know I'm not alone in feeling peeved that those of us who go about our business quietly -- moving about and dressed modestly -- have no choice but to put up with the effects of "cultural second-hand smoke" just because other women move and dress to make men ogle at, uh, certain parts of their female anatomy. Sometimes I feel like asking them (the va-va-voom-garbed women) if they could please move to another planet so that I wouldn't have to put up (or not so much anyway) with a hyper-sexualized environment and inadvertently avoid...picking up after such women, so to speak. For some reason, that's how I feel about the whole thing -- that I end up with the dirt unwittingly caused by women (well, people in general) who apparently don't value upholding decency and modesty in society as much as I do. Is it fair in this case to say "you create the dirt, you clean it up and don't get any on me"? Sounds harsh but...

Suffice it to say, I love gentlemen, and I do what I can to help them be such. And I can see that when women don't act like ladies, this hardly brings out the gentlemen in the male members of the populace.

Also, I find it somewhat amusing when a woman looks disgruntled (or uncomfortable at best) when her barely clothed self elicits gazes from men. This commenter at The Rebelution blog sums up my sentiments succinctly:

I’ll tell ya what gets me. It is the woman who dresses [to] emphasize her sexuality and then has the nerve to get upset when men notice it.

She ends her comment with this:

But I do believe if a woman wants to be respected for her mind, that is the part of her she is required to reveal.

This and some 100+ more other comments were generated by a post that contained yet another comment which touched on on the Modesty Survey conducted by The Rebelution (it ended up with over 1,000 men participating). The comment essentially objected to the survey, and in somewhat scathing words. Here's the post:

Feminism and the Modesty Survey

The following (real) comments typify a general objection to The Modesty Survey. This post is primarily intended to address a specific method of voicing concern, not to condemn the voicing of concern. We have and do welcome your feedback.

I’m confused…what girl needs advice from male strangers about how to dress? Is this advice for blind girls? Don’t they have moms or sisters or friends or…someone? Maybe we should concentrate on the real problem: finding homes for these poor blind orphans!

I have a secret to tell you: Guys don’t actually like spineless females. You may think that acting subservient will make boys like you, but in the end it won’t. Don’t take the blame for the actions of horny teenage boys.

We are not required to shroud ourselves in drab, baggy clothes to protect the innocent eyes and hearts of our Christian brothers. Women have hips, boobs, legs, shoulders, lips, and skin. God put ‘em there, and apparently he was content with a fig leaf to cover up the “immodest” parts, so I don’t know why today’s boys need so much extra coddling.

Sorry… used to think this site was cool, but now I see what it’s really about.

While we gladly tolerate differing opinions, and even attacks on ourselves, these kinds of comments (e.g. girls who care about modesty are “spineless”) can come across as ridiculing the very girls the authors are apparently concerned for.

The Rebelution operates under the classical view of tolerance, in which you are not required to agree with your opponent’s ideas, but must respect them as people. We hope that everyone will embrace this principle in any future interaction.

In regard to the specific allegation—that The Modesty Survey places blame on women—we’re afraid this is a misinterpretation of our purpose.

From reviewing the results, we can tell you that 99% the guys who have taken the survey fully recognize their own responsibility to control their thoughts and actions. They are not blaming the girls, but they are admitting that some (not all) things can be a problem for them. The survey results are only intended for Christian girls who wish to assist their brothers in that fight.

It is actually slightly amusing that here we have 1,500+ men humbly admitting their weakness and voicing their need for women’s help—and all at the women’s request, we might add—and we’re still accused of being male chauvinists. [Note: For a more thorough explanation regarding how we view men and women, click here.]

One thing's for sure: you've got to check out the comments.