Wednesday, February 21, 2007

The ride

The past week has had me riding the MRT more often. Frankly, I was not prepared for the deluge of commuters during the rush hours. When did the number of people in Manila swell to such proportions??

First of all, there are the queues. Queues, queues and queues everywhere. Queues to enter the elevator. Queues to go up the escalator. Queues to have your belongings inspected. Then when you finally get to enter the station, more queues to buy a ticket. Then, queues to swipe your card. Then queues to board the train. Now these are not your ordinary queues, but queues that are pretty long and go around this way and that in a snake-like manner.

Needless to say, using the public transportation in Manila is a test of patience.

One wonderful thing about this mode of transportation, however, is the all-female car, which is the first car of every train that passes. Anticipating riding a car whose only men (if any) would be little boys and elderly gents is a delight. I don't feel like elaborating at this time, but if you're a woman and you know how life is in a Third World tropical country, you know what I'm talking about. =)

Last week I happened to catch my ride seated all the way to my place of destination. Then on one of the stops, a woman found herself standing right in front of me, holding on to the safety handles. She looked 30ish and her belly was kind of bulging, but I wasn't sure if the bulge was of the flabby kind or of the expectant kind. For a few minutes I was trying to figure it out, glancing at her midsection from time to time. I wanted to offer her my seat 'cause a pregnant lady is sure to take a lot of comfort in getting off her feet. I thought of asking her outright but was afraid to since I didn't want to risk hurting her feelings. Need I explain? My question could be interpreted as somewhere along the lines of "you're fat."

So, I ended up sitting comfortably the whole way, passing up the chance to give that comfort to someone else. And I felt like something I hadn't felt for a very long time. I felt like a coward.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

haha, I would prefer to be coward and comfortable than being generous and uneasy...

sunnyday said...

Well, comfort has its rewards, I agree. But generosity -- often if not always -- spreads and influences others in such a positive way. I think I'd rather have that.

Next time I'm presented with a chance to give up my seat for a pregnant-looking woman, I'll take it!

John Jansen said...

Something I've done in similar situations is to nonchalantly get up and move to another part of the bus or train and not look as if I was doing so because of the pregnant-looking woman near me.

Anonymous said...

i remember my sister while wearing a dress cut for pregnant women, was offered by a seat in a bus.

she was so excited of the offer and was beaming when she told me the story.

Was it the action of the man or was it the joy of being thought to be pregnant?

i forgot to ask her

sunnyday said...

Hahaha! That's funny, anonymous. =)

Fortunately, empire-cut tops and loose styles are among those in fashion nowadays so that could be one advantage -- being mistaken for being an expectant mom, thus the "pampering" by others.

sunnyday said...

John,

That's one option. But you know what? Where I am, commuters in general seem to be feel deserving of a seat on the mrt. So if a chance to get a seat crops up, they grab it. Once I did just what you related. Since I didn't really gesture to the lady that it was to her I was offering my seat, the moment I got up the fellow beside her plopped down on the vacant spot. Obviously, he didn't care (or didn't notice) that someone else needed the seat more than he did.

My theory is that since one pays more for an airconditioned and very smooth mrt ride (which is more expensive and faster than a bus ride, he feels he has the right to a seat.

petrufied said...

being generous IS good, and to offer a seat to somebody who seems to need it more than you do is what we as, well, catholics, are called to do.

but nowadays, sometimes, when i give up something i have for the comfort of somebody else (in my case, i often give up my hand-loop to shorter people on the train, because i'm rarely fast enough to get a seat anyway), i notice that some people are like, "nye, look at her, pretending to be good." i don't know, do you sense that?

it makes me feel like the world has gone cynical. i'm happy i read this entry, even if what happened didn't turn out like you hoped. it's good to know that some people still believe in helping others.

;-D

sunnyday said...

Nicole, maybe the ones who have that reaction to your offering your hand-loop to the shorter ones are just defensive (maybe about their height?) =) That's just my guess. Or it could be that they're not accustomed to seeing people nowadays giving up their own comfort for the benefit of another. So, at least because of your gesture, they see something different. =)

There are MANY people who go out of their way to help others -- I'm sure of that! We just have to look harder to see them.

Anonymous said...

That is a real difficulty. If someone offers me his/her seat, I would be insulted. I know the room is full and all seats are taken, I am prepared to stand it up to the final station.

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